Rock of Ages
We got up early and had to sc
ramble quickly. It was the first time sleeping in the rig (street side) and it was a rough night. At around 12am we were startled awake by the radio blaring Def Leppards’s “Rock of Ages“. Apparently, the alarm was defaulted to go off at that time. Ken bolted up and bumped his head on the sloped ceiling where the sleeping quarters reside. We laughed about that for a good while before getting back to a restless sleep.
Five sleepless hours later and it is zero hour. The plan was to have everything wrapped up and ready to go by end of day the night before. Nope, didn’t happen. In haste, we threw what was left into boxes and/or into the trash. Once again I left many of my precious plants and pots behind. The rig, Serenity, was a disaster inside – stuff just thrown in where ever an empty space could be found. I was beyond tired. I felt like I couldn’t possibly make one more decision.
After we cleared the house I walked alone through the empty space, walking along the perimeter of each room, thanking the home that had provided sanctuary, shelter and safety, as my tears freely fell. It looked much like it did when we moved in except now it had a piece of me instilled in its energy – the colors we chose to paint the walls, the dark wood flooring, and light fixtures. Hours of thought went into designing the space and it was very much a reflection of our hearts. We had a relationship with this nonliving entity built of wooden bones and painted skin… and it was very difficult to say goodbye.
Note: “Rock of Ages” is the title of a well-known Christian hymn first published in 1775. The phrase “Rock of Ages” refers to Jesus Christ.
I know it sounds crazy. It was just a structure, a building with no life of its own. But we lived there for six years and in that time built a shared memory that dovetails animate with inanimate. We will certainly miss the home we created. Even so, life is so much more than a home address and we could no longer ignore our hearts cry for something different – a need to expand our understanding of life.
Camp Site
Tired as we were, we hit the road for a 3.5 hour drive to Castle Rock State Park in Idaho. It didn’t take long to realize that we had over loaded the rig and the truck. The engine was struggling and the rig was too heavy on her back end. It took one “sway” incident and we exited the freeway at the first opportunity to redistribute the load. That seemed to help a bit but it was still clear we were carrying too much weight.
Honestly, by the end of this we just couldn’t think clearly. It was a white knuckle ride for the next three hours. When we arrived at our destination it was 100 degrees outside and we now had the fun task of backing the rig up into the narrow camp space. And then a wonderful thing happened.
Something Lost, Something Gained
A woman was walking along the campground road and as she approached our location she stopped and smiling she said “Don’t worry, I’m not stalking you”. She was looking for something she had lost on her way out of the campground and had come back to find it. As she saw us struggling to park the rig I asked if she could help and that I’d be happy to help her find what she had lost. She graciously helped us and as we were maneuvering and adjusting the rig her husband walked up having not had any luck finding the lost item either. George, a spry 83 year old Chilean, then proceeded to help Ken get the rig backed in successfully.
We got to talking and found out George and Joanne are avid rock climbers (yes, they both climb still) and that’s why they were camping here at Castle Rock. The item they had lost happened to be a hitch pin. Ken called George over and said “I have something for ya.” He then handed him a hitch pin and we all felt grateful for this “chance” meeting. We then said our goodbyes and felt buoyed by the genuine goodness that is still to be found in humanity. This couple was such an inspiration to us and they even have a Wikipedia page that details their many rock climbing achievements! We hope to run into them again someday.
Ease the Pain
The next day everything, all the stress of the previous month, hit me like a train and I was down all day with a migraine. I used to get them often but the last few years they almost disappeared so it was quite unpleasant to feel that pain again. The body is a funny thing. It’s as if in the process of “letting go” and coming down off the unrelenting physical and emotional demands of moving, all the stress got “stuck” in my most vulnerable area – my head. It’s embarrassing to admit but the only way to ease the pain is to cry (grief unleashed), which makes it worse in the moment, but once the pain is released the headache diminishes.
Today, I feel lighter. I keep organizing and improving the rig accommodations working out all the kinks. Staying busy helps me stay grounded and realize that what just happened over the past few days was real. All of this still feels very much like a dream for both of us. As I watch my husband slide right into this new lifestyle I can see a boyishness come back into his face. This is who he is in his heart – never more at peace than when he is dreaming with the stars, observing the life all around him, getting lost in deep thought and daily increasing in Love’s wisdom. And the book he is writing will finally get the attention it requires!
Love Connection
To date this journey has already connected us to some wonderful people we would never have met otherwise. Before the chance meeting with Joanne and George we “accidentally” met Cherry and Joe during the melee of moving. They manage the storage facility that now holds the remainder of our material goods. Oddly, I called the wrong storage facility the day I made arrangements. If I had not made that “mistake” we would not have met.
With all the wackiness in the world right now – meeting Cherry and Joe was like finding a treasure and we hope to maintain our new friendship in the years to come. A few days before we left on our adventure she gave me a simple bon voyage gift, a hand towel, that reads “Happy Campers Live Here”. It’s true and although we realize that we will still struggle in this new life, we now are taking a more active role in how we live it. Thanks for reading and remember “It’s better to burn out, yeah, than to fade away”.
Maybe you should have woken up to “Bang Your Head”! Good luck on your new adventure. How’s the kitty?
Yes, that would have been perfect ;). Our adventure has taken quite a different turn… need to write another blog update. Pangur is doing really well – such a great temperament and is just rolling with the punches. We will have to catch up soon <3
Well, that was vivid! I almost felt like i was with Ken, enjoying the outdoors and the adventure. There was some courageous honesty in there as well. Good job! Hope u add some pics to the next one!
Josh! I really love to write. Sadly, it took me this long to discover my passion. I have always been a late bloomer it seems ;). I will definitely be taking more photos and videos! Thanks so much for commenting 💕
I love reading your adventure- I felt I was with you every step you took. You have the gift of writing.
Tess! Thank you so much that really means a lot 😊 Hope to visit soon!